Whatever it is... do you really think you have it bad? Let me school you on something. This was a scene I saw masa in Jakarta kat Pasar Baru
There was this old lady. When I saw her first... she was sitting down. With a wizened old face, scrunched up through years of bullshit she probably had to go through, she cut a forlorn figure sitting on her own, with a cane, and a black plastic bag, watching the world go by in the fast paced and unforgivingly challenging metropolitan city of Jakarta.
Oh yes... people stopped occasionally to give her money. But she never asked for it. Not once. Not at all. She would sit for half an hour intervals or so for about fifteen minutes to rest her tired feet, yang cuma pakai selipar nipis, offering no protection whatsoever for her tired, aging toes.
No... she walked with a slow shuffle. One step at a time, almost painfully. Painful even to watch.
Her strength was in her will, her heart and her resolve.
Sebab selepas beberapa langkah, I saw her use the same cane that barely supported her weight, to take a stab at some plastic flying and swirling on the ground. She bent over slowly and with much effort, pulled at the plastic pastu masukkan dalam beg sampah dia.
Probably in her Seventies, nenek tua ni masih bekerja. She had no time for self pity.
She had no time for moaning about her fate.
Never mind her drab night gown. Or the cracked soles of her feet. Tu semua tak penting. Yang penting meneruskan tugasnya tanpa mengharap belas kasihan orang kerana umur atau keadaan dirinya.
She just kept going at it. Slowly cleaning whatever area she could cover for little bits of trash. Tak henti henti...
Menjerit hati aku... ,menangis... meraung melihat kegigihan nenek tua nih.
Honestly. I cried. I cried as I sat on the stairs observing her for over half an hour. Thinking about the selfish people in my life who think THEY'VE got problems.
Thinking about myself and how I allowed to let insignificant things pull me away from the flow of my life.. those little dramas, I allow myself to be engaged in. She shamed me for not being happy with what I have and not being thankful enough with her strength.
And she made me angry at myself and a lot of people who seldom appreciate the things we take so for granted.
She could have... but she didn't. She was earning her living. And tetap nenek tua nih, pas abihkan her refreshment, offering perhaps a minute burst of energy, she continued. Painfully.
Inspiring me with every second, as I shed tear after tear. about how she persevered in the face of adversity. Looking back at these pictures, I recall how she handled herself.
Derita nya hanya Tuhan je yang tahu. Tapi dia tak pernah menyerah kalah pada takdirnya. She did something about it.
And
maybe, at the the end of it. She's the happiest person if all of us
were compared. Happy not in terms of much for us, but in terms of her
true spirit to fight against the predetermined fate of our lives,
and making me at least, realise that we choose to make ourselves what
we are.
Someone asked me, "why don't you do something about it. Why don't you give her some money."
I could. I always do when I see someone who needs that help. But
money... unlike what some will believe... is not the answer to
everything.
I identified with something in this old woman. Something
told me, while she will not refuse aid, her pride was worth a lot more.
That's why she wanted to EARN her living.
In every painful step. She looked more taller, with a more elegant
poise than most people I've seen and more beautiful in my eyes than
anyone I've ever met in my whole life.
Her beauty came from her
strength, her heart, her will and her poise in dealing with the world.
And bagaimana dia tidak menyalahkan takdir untuk nasibnya, dan menyerah
kalah begitu saja.
No amount of material items on you can make you
as beautiful as this old lady. Kepada nenek, I know you won't be
reading this, but I pray to God... that he'll bless you for you are
truly one of his most beautiful creations.
Aku nitis air mata
ketika taip ni... in my few days of incessant drama never ceasing, you
have taught me a lesson without knowing about what real courage and
strength is. May God bless you...
